Blotchy facial KP ruined my life

Glad to find this forum, hopefully it is supportive and worthwhile. I am 40 (almost 41) and have had KP since probably 11 years old or so. I don't really mind it much except for the right side of my face. The left side of my face has a slight red tint but it is uniform and not blotchy. The right side however is very blotchy and red and (of course) fluctuates in intensity depending on the temperature, my mood, etc. I feel as if the blotchy right side of my face has really ruined my life. It has prevented me from being very confident with women and other things. I always hate when I have fun through physical exertion and then look in a mirror and see how horribly red and blotchy my face is. It completely ruins my mood and makes me want to run away to some cool, dark hole and hide. Many years ago I started using dermacolor makeup to at least tone it down. I don't put on a lot and the makeup doesn't make it disappear but it does tone it down significantly. Still, I'm a pretty masculine guy and putting on makeup feels so weird. I have tried all kinds of things but nothing works to get rid of it. The last thing I did was get tons of laser treatments (a few thousand dollars worth). It didn't help at all. Over the last year I have also developed sun damage on my forehead. In short, I'm a mess and facial KP sucks. I'm middle-aged, single, never married, and no kids. The last gf I had was in 2008-2009, and I tend to drink a lot if I start. And I believe my horrible skin problem has been the root cause of all of my issues because no matter what I do, I still have that horrible, red, blotchy face. I am actually glad I never had kids because I would hate to pass this condition on to someone else. But, that's life. Anyway, I would highly recommend dermacolor for those seeking a way to at least tone it down during the day. It goes unnoticed if you keep it light. And, for the record, I have never seen anyone else with a blotchy face like mine. If anyone here has a blotchy KP face, let me know. Maybe we can bond!